SEEEEXXX PLEASE
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Randomize
