i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
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