I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
