I want to stick my p in your. b.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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