You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
