when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
