the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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