he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
are you so shy because you have an std?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
