hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
