i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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