I am in a vortex of obligation.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
