My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
So much rum. So many feels.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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