Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
