Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize