There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Randomize
