is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
