I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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