People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
