she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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