who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Randomize
