Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Pińatas plus fireworks don't mix well
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
