Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize