how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize