where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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