I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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