this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
i out mim tonsoeep
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