Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
