Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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