he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
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He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
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Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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