She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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