This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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