he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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