I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
