Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
