I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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