im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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