You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize