it was like having sex with a tree stump
Walk of Shame today included voting.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize