I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I don't think brook has ever known best
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
