I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Randomize
