new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
