I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
