**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Can you bring me the toilet please
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
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