I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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