Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
