what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize