She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize