Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
worst night to have a conscience
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Randomize