Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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