We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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