it hurts more in the daytime
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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