oh god the rape fog is back!
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
